That was the year that was....

And so I'm here again. New Years Eve.

Last time I was here on this blog writing about New Years Eve it was 31st December 2012, and I was looking back on a year that didn't appear to have too much going for it. Career-wise I was drifting, doing two zero-hour contract jobs that meant my weekly income could fluctuate wildly and that weren't going to satisfy me intellectually in the long-term. On the personal front, whilst 2012 saw my relationship with my other half definitely move forward out of the rut that it had been in for the best part of 8 years (I'd always known it was that long, but there's something about it being actually written down that makes it much more starker and unacceptable), the movement was that small that I was the only person that would have been able to register it.

To that end I laid down a few targets (I shied away from the word resolution for the simple fact that I wanted to give myself every chance of accomplishing them) for 2013. Here's how I got on....

Target one was to blog more, and I gave myself the specific target of updating the blog at least once a week. A simple glance upwards at the menu listing the number of blogs that I actually published over the last 12 months will be enough to tell you that, although I did publish blog posts over the last twelve months, I came absolutely nowhere near to that stated target. I even revised my target in June to the equivalent of one post every fortnight, which, if I had followed it through, would have meant making at least 15 posts to this blog during the second half of the year.

Ahem.

In my defence, just as I posted in June, this has partly been to do with being overwhelmed with work, certainly over the last two months anyway, and partly to do with writing blog posts that are far too long and complicated, leaving me with at least half a dozen uncompleted blog posts that have no relevance to the world today. So I think the official verdict on this target is: must do better. A lot better.

Target two was to work on the career, having by the end of the year formed a clear idea of where I am going, planned how I am going to get there and be putting it into action. Like target one, this is probably best summed up by saying must do better. I am still working two jobs, on zero-hours contracts, but the jobs (or, to be more precise, one of them) have at least changed and my hours are much more predictable, even if my work-life balance has gone completely out of kilter in the process. In the process I have ruled out the back-up career as a viable alternative, purely for reasons related to the sake of my sanity, so that's progress of sorts isn't it? Anyway, if I get any time to myself then this is what will be my priority for next year.

Target three was to sort my relationship out. This is where the real progress in my life has been made this year. His nibs and myself have spent so much more time together: we have not only met up with each other so much more frequently but we've gone away for weekends on a regular basis and have even had our first proper holiday. The verdict for this part of 2013 is definitely a positive one: we've made real progress in the relationship. The logistical problems caused by living in two different parts of the country are still there, and realistically we can't go much further as a couple without resolving them (which fundamentally means me moving to be with him as he is tied to his geographical location because of work), but as a couple we definitely end 2013 in much better shape than we began it in.


So, overall, 2013 leaves me better off than it found me in, but in some aspects of my life, not by much. Will 2014 finally be the year I get my sh*t together? Watch this space.....

It's not going well.....

So, in my last post, on 28 January I wrote about how, although I had been visiting this blog and making progress with actually writing something, I was failing miserably to conclude those posts and publish them. I then expressed the hope that by publishing a short update on my failure to keep up with my stated aim of publishing a post once a week, it would in fact stimulate me to get all those posts that I have started completed.

As the French say, plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose.

I do have some sort of excuse for the lack of posting in that work got a lot more hectic shortly after that post, and I barely had enough free time to get anything like a decent amount of sleep let alone do anything more substantial like write cohesively and in a concentrated enough time span to allow for completion in a reasonable amount of time. I have, once more, written a number of (extensive) posts about events that were then current, but due to lack of time to complete them during the height of their relevance, remain unfinished due to their being no point right now. I'm taking the long view though that what I have written, whilst not going to be published in their original form, can be used in some form or other, even if it takes time for that use to be realised. In the meantime I will revise my blogging aims somewhat for this year, perhaps this time being a bit more realistic about what I can achieve. So I will aim to post something, on average, at least once every two weeks for the remainder of the year. With about 30 weeks of the year left, that should mean around 15 posts by the end of December 2013. With this modest challenge set, even I should be able to manage this.....

News from Nowhere

On January 1 I published a blogpost that set myself three goals for 2013. The last two of these aims were relatively general and were to be worked on throughout the year: whether I had successfully achieved those aims or not would unfold over the space of the year; at this early stage in the calendar at least, there would be no clear signs of success or failure. Only one of these aims - the first of them - contained specific details to which I could be held accountable for. Relating to this blog, my first aim for 2013 was to make sure that I blogged at least once week. Given that this is my first blogpost since January 1, I think it's fairly safe to say that, so far, 2013 is not going as I planned it to. That is not to say that my first New Year goal is a complete and utter failure. Not only have I looked at the blog between 1 January and now, but I have been working on some new posts. The problem is that, as with last year, those posts that I have been working on remain works in progress. So, by posting this short update about my lack of progress in posting updates to my blog, I'm intending to conclude the vicious circle I was recreating for myself for this year and begin a new, more virtuous circle of publication.

New Year, fresh start?

1 January 2013.

So here we are. A New Year.

A time for looking forward, for anticipating what is to come and for forging new paths.

I'm not sure that what I have in mind for the next 12 months could be strictly quantified as resolutions, but whether they are or not I certainly hope that they avoid the fate of most New Year resolutions.

1. Starting off simply, blog more. I started this blog off as a means of getting to write more in the hopes that this would in turn assist my other writing. But after starting my blog, aside from my post of yesterday all other posts begun last year either remain in draft format or ended up being deleted because they led nowhere or took so long to complete they were no longer relevant. So in 2013 I plan to update this blog at least once a week.

2. A more general aim for 2013 is to work on the career, having by the end of the year formed a clear idea of where I am going, planned how I am going to get there and be putting it into action.

3. My final aim for 2013 is to sort my relationship out. Whilst it's much better than it was it's still nowhere near where it needs to be if we're going to have a long-term future. It's not going to be easy to sort out - there are both emotional and logistical issues involved - but hopefully by the end of the year there'll be a lot less of them.

2013 - here I come.

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehn, goodbye...

....to 2012 anyway.

Another calendar year is over and done with and what have I got to show for it?

On the surface, probably not much. I'm sure if you were to ask my friends how my life differs from how it stood on 1 January 2012, I'm sure that pretty much all of them would say that it doesn't. After all, I'm still not employed in any sort of job that could reasonably described as a career/vocation that could last me the rest of my life. Nor has my long-term long-distance relationship changed as far as can be reasonably discerned: we're still living 300 miles apart and we've still not met each other's parents, let alone entered into any other more significant relationship milestones.

Yet when I review the last year, and especially the last six months, I think there are grounds for cautious optimism. Whilst my job situation is far from ideal, I think that the last six months has given me a good basis from which to make a final concerted effort at working in the field that I ultimately want to work in, but with the knowledge that there is a viable alternative as a back-up. And whilst the relationship might look like nothing's changed, in the last six months plenty has. First and foremost, we're now seeing other on a regular basis, averaging once every 3 weeks. And whilst that might not seem a lot, given that over the previous eight years of the relationship we saw each other once every 3 months, it's a vast improvement.

So, for the first time in 4 or so years, I can say goodbye to this year knowing that the last twelve months haven't just been about treading water or heading backwards. As to what I want from 2013? Well that's another blogpost...